So….It’s been about 159 Fridays since I’ve posted one of these and about 77 since I’ve posted at all. BUT …. If you were in hibernation ….. it just doesn’t add up the same way.
My last post was in March of 2014 and then …. the shit storm hit. It was one of those storms that came from a few directions and in the form of sub-humans with some pretty ugly souls.
One super fun thing that happened was being dragged through the court system. I think it started something like this:
(A true Sour Grapes story … voices in the little brain talking)
“Damn!! I can’t believe how happy that person is without me. How dare she and the spawn live and prosper. I’ll show them. No one gets to be happier than me, especially…without me. Who cares if that’s pretty easy to do.
Hey. I know. I’ll rack up a whole bunch of bills. Then …. I’ll file bankruptcy so I don’t have to actually pay them. Okay. Now that that’s done …. I’ll stop my other financial obligations by jumping through a legal loop hole that allows you to become a deadbeat without any recourse (or remorse)whatsoever. How cool is that??!!
Okay. Now, I’m going to have a legal temper tantrum. I have enough money to hire a douche baggy legal wench to sue everyone for whatever bullshit I can make up. They won’t care. I’m paying them after all. I’ll even show my brand of crazy. Who cares! It’s the dollar signs they’re looking at.
Wow. It’s so easy to get someone to force people through the legal system and destroy little hearts and souls when you have money and time ….. and …… let’s admit ….. absolutely nothing better to do in life than obsess about people who don’t think you are a God.
Wow! I’ve managed to make the contempt people had for me grow deeper. I’ve put some nasty things up on the internet about everyone to make myself feel better though. Who cares if the court said not to …. I’m a superhero badass. Didn’t you know??!! I’m untouchable.
Okay. I’ve tried to delay this as long as possible. Seems like the docket says NOW!!
What??!! The legal system isn’t my friend anymore? I really have to meet my obligations? I can’t force people to kiss my ass and shout out my name in glory? At least I walked away with something. I get the thrill of knowing that people are being forced to see me. Hey. That’s one step above sneaking up behind them with a cloth of formaldehyde and pulling them into a van. I also got some alone time with the one that got away. Of course she got away really fast, kicking and screaming for her life, but that’s okay. I managed to force some time with her for a bit.
(….some months go by) Well .… It’s getting pretty boring doing what’s right. I haven’t managed to make the time feel less like an imprisonment to those around me and the alone time I so desperately sought from the one that got away …. well .… it has officially ended. And …. It wasn’t a fairytale romance. It was more like the end of a Lethal Weapon movie and I was on the receiving end of Mel and Danny.
On the upside I can try to make a fuss about this post that I’m no doubt stalking. Oh wait …. some little masterminds managed to get all my stuff off the internet and copy it for safe keeping. I guess I’m out of tricks.”
So…..Here I am. Alive and well. I’ll try not to be a stranger. Oh yeah….Can I just add: Money can’t buy happiness. (AND) In your face!!