Haiku Sunday: Easter


Easter is now here

Christ and egg hunts do not mix

Candy cross children?

We missed church today

The kids do not understand

Bunnies rule today

Let’s celebrate life

With yellow marshmallow chicks

For death we roast them

Thanks for the rise dude

Hallmark is your biggest fan

You should make them tithe

Vikings: Raiding while philosophizing?


Many moons ago,  my Icelandic friend game me a book of sayings. The book, The Sayings of the Vikings, consists of short poems (proverbs/wisdom) translated into English. Let’s see if there is anything we can sink our teeth into as we approach another holiday destined to bring family and friends together to eat and argue.

 

Advice to a visitor:

When passing

a door-post,

watch as you walk on,

inspect as you enter.

It is uncertain

where enemies lurk

or crouch in a dark corner.

Sounds like a good warning against an elder, who spends a lot of time in the hospital. You never know when they might pee in a cup and throw it on you as you pass. I have to say: I’m not sure I’d feel comfortable going to a home where I would have to be so cautious. Let me guess, the invite reads “Bring a covered dish and weapon of choice.”

 

Attending a feast:

No man should call

himself clever

but manage his mind.

A sage visitor

is a silent guest.

The cautious evades evil.

Never a friend

more faithful,

nor great wealth, than wisdom.

Again, these Vikings must have had some interesting gatherings. Pass the dinosaur sized turkey leg and then await your beat down. Though, I am quite partial to guests that let me do all the talking.

 

Drinking:

Ale

has too often

been praised by poets.

the longer you drink

the less sense

your mind makes of things.

Of course poets praise alcohol, it makes their work appear more brilliant. I hope the Vikings aren’t discouraging drinking here, because we all know, the best moments are from dumb asses who drink too much. I really can’t see cutting this out of the agenda. It’s a must have for free entertainment. Make sure it’s BYOB to keep it free.

 

Self-Discipline:

The glutton does not guard himself

eats till he’s ill.

Wiser men

only mock

a fool’s fat belly.

Yeah, it’s pretty gross watching a guest eat until they vomit all over the dinner plates. It seems the Vikings are all for calling people out on their fatness though. Seems a little cruel, but…if the Vikings said it…………..

 

The Nature of Hospitality:

I would be invited

everywhere

if I needn’t eat at all.

Or if I left two hams

at the house of a friend

where I’ve eaten only one.

This sounds about right. I  prefer inviting those who bring things to eat, but don’t eat themselves. It’s a great way to save on groceries.