I don’t know people. It’s a close one.
Hey Ladies: Did you know that you can do more with cucumbers than……Ummmm…….make a salad? It’s true. With the help of my wise friends, Mr. and Mrs. Trapped Wolf, I have made pickles (dill, sweet, sandwich). AND…..Since no one has lived long enough to know how long canned pickles last, it looks like if I ever run out of batteries…..I mean condoms…..I mean CONDIMENTS…..then, I’m at least covered in with pickles.
Thing 3 hung up on her dad yesterday. I asked her why. She said she got mad at him because he heard me talking in the background and shouted at her: “What’s your mom running her mouth about now?”………WELL……I’m glad she took a stand. I called him back and let him know I was running my mouth to her about him: “Would your Dad like me to drop you off at his house?”………What an ass!……I told my daughter that happy people don’t say things like that. NOW…..She still likes her dad, but feels a bit sorry for him because he may not be so happy.
SO…….The challenge was: To post a picture taken the day you read the posting about the theme of the challenge. No cheating allowed!
Lucky me…….I read this post at 9:46 at night. It’s dark outside and everyone is asleep. I didn’t think the nachos I pulled out of the oven would make a great shot, so I snapped one of the jars on my kitchen countertop.
Try to hold your excitement. AND……I don’t want to hear from those who wanted to see the nachos.
I missed the last Friday Frenzy because I am a pathetic slackass!
- I’ve decided I’m a freaking genius. I’ve learned how to save money, prevent diseases and embarrass my kids at the same time. It’s a triple win folks! AND…..In case you’re wondering, I don’t mean by telling my kids about grownups kissing and wrestling naked. I said embarrass, not damage psychologically. Although, it would save future money and prevent disease. HMMMMMMMMMM……………..This is the boring story: When the bathroom hand towel started to resemble a petri dish, I decided to buy a commercial hand towel dispenser. No more surprises on my towel. Thing 2 had no issue with the tissue, until we went to a local Mexican restaurant. Thing 2 went to the bathroom and returned with a look of doom. He said we embarrassed him. WHY? We have the same towel dispenser as the restaurant bathroom. Since I love to torment the Things, I replaced our old toilet tissue holder with a commercial one. I had to buy coreless tissue for the contraption. I bought 36 rolls, which weighed in at 30lbs. One roll of our previous toilet tissue lasted about 3 days in this house. A new roll………about 10-12 days.
- And the new stuff goes so well with my sign on the door.
- Lady Foot Locker sucks big time. I had to order a pair of shoes from them because the store in my area didn’t carry my size. One week later, I get a letter stating that no Lady Foot Locker in existence has the shoe I selected in my size. WTF!……I’m not Big Foot people and I’m not a tiny person from The Borrowers. Size 9! You’d think I asked for plutonium. Homeland security is going to be disappointed when they pop over to this blog.
- My Marital Hiccup (ex), told the kids he wasn’t going to pick up the phone if it was from my house or my cell. I asked why. Apparently, he was on the phone with his new girlfriend, he clicked over to answer my call and hung up on her. It was an accident, but I guess she thought he had his priorities out of whack. So…….he got mad at me. I didn’t realize I was responsible for his inability to use call waiting. My bad! I’m so glad I don’t have the hiccups anymore.
- SO…….I may have mentioned (sometime back) that my friends, Mr. and Mrs. Trapped Wolf are trying to teach me about canning. Here is what I have learned so far: Canning bushels of peas is easy. Taking them out of their pods is a bitch. I got pea lash on my fingertips.
- My Cowboy finally got his money. That’s all I’m gonna say about that nonsense.
- Wish me luck. I am working on a writing project. The good news is: It’s pretty much all written. The bad news: It’s all on paper and I have to put it into the computer. KILL ME NOW!……………….YES……………..I’m an idiot.