Weekly Photo Challenge: Nostalgic


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(Left to right: My Bro, Me and My Sis)

Once sweatshirts and blue jeans…

now suits and ties.

Once hitting boys on the playground…

to hitting on boys at the bars.

Once dreams were larger than life…

now you have priorities and goals.

You couldn’t wait to grow up…

and now all you want to do is go back.

 

Weekly Photo Challenge: Future Tense


Scrabble Photo 001

This is the future, but also right now.

You aren’t welcome back, no way, no how.

No open arms and no open doors.

It’s clear to all, if it wasn’t before.

You are damaged and toxic, with no moral code.

Picking on children at your age. How bold!

We understand your life sucks pretty hard.

But that’s your fault, so don’t throw crap in our yard.

Haters hate and you are no exception.

I’m pretty sure it started at your conception.

If you’re still in the dark, let me turn on the light.

Without you around, the future is bright.

(Word to your mother…..)

 

SEX THIS YEAR Threatens Stay-at Home Mom with Disabled Child Living Paycheck to Paycheck


It’s not that exciting people. SEX THIS YEAR is the name of a “magazine” and WordPress blog site. The creator has his panties in a bunch over an earlier blog post Jeremie Mouithsone: Who?  . I say……get bigger panties and stop attempting to bully me.

Clearly, he didn’t read the post or doesn’t understand the language I used. That would be ENGLISH! I posted a copy of a letter HE sent to me. I added my own little spin. Apparently, my post brought unwanted attention to Mr. Mouithsone……AND…….He “no likey”. Someone said they were screwed over by him, and some woman mentioned his pre-ejaculation issues.

WELL……Here he is, verbally pre-ejaculating here. I took a second comment directed towards Lawrence off. Seriously Mr. Mouithsone! Lawrence and I aren’t blog roomies. Take your issues to his side of the internet. I am not a couples counselor.

Here’s what he sent to me:

Hell Lorre,

I hope you have already seen my response to your stupid, messages, If I can remember, you and I have never had any business deal, and I wonder why you go about spreading wrong message about online?

Here are my conditions, please do take that article about me down, within the next few days, otherwise I would now choice, but to destroy your entire life online and I mean it.

As mentioned above, Lawrence was a client of ours, we did provide ads as promised, but he went on stalking on the girl that was assigned to his account, and we had no choice but discontinue his campaign. We have all proofs, such as his harassment emails send to the girl.

So I’m giving you two days to pull down the article, failure to do so, will result into an online fight between you and me, and trust me, you don’t want to see what I would say about you, because I will find your real name.

So, please pull down you article, I do not know you, and I’ve never done anything wrond to you

My response:

Hell Jeremie,

Listen. Although, I appreciate you “liking” my post and becoming a follower, I really need you to step into reality. Perhaps where you’re from, its common to throw tantrums and bully women. In America, most women aren’t threatened by men, who are shorter than their twelve-year-old. Plus, I think my daughter has more facial hair than you. (Sorry baby!) I’ll give you an “A” for effort though. If I hadn’t had so much coffee before reading your note, I probably would’ve given you a 1 on the threat scale.

Let me take some responsibility here. I’m sorry I posted an email you sent me, which became my property once you did. I’m sorry I added humor to the letter and gave your “highly regarded in your mind” magazine free press. Apparently, there is no humor in your land.

To be clear, we never did any monkey business together. And definitely not funny business! Also, I post wrong messages and pics on the internet all the time. It is a learning curve, but as a follower, you’ll catch on. I also have a strict policy about not deleting my posts. Unless the order comes directly from the President, or someone offering me bundles of cash, I can’t do it.

Its kind of exciting…..getting under someone’s skin so much, they want to destroy your entire life online.  You do know that I am not a virtual character, right?!? I didn’t even use the internet until I was out of college. So…...in essence, you are leaving me with the best years of my life. Regarding destroying my life, thanks for saying you “mean it”. It is important to keep promises.

You and Lawrence have a very complex relationship. It is full of passion and money exchanging hands. You two need to get a room and hash it out. I’m not into that scene.

Thanks for warning me about the fight. Are we going to meet after school or during recess? And thanks for not being a sexist. Clearly, you have no issues threatening a member of the opposite sex. You make me feel like one of the little guys. Just so you know, I’ve heard it all before. There is nothing you can say about me that I haven’t said and posted myself. If you have trouble finding things, there’s a porn video floating around with me and some zoo animals. I filmed it before I was placed in witness protection for breaking up the Animal Prostitution Ring of 92. Its okay if you find out my real name. Witness protection will just relocate me and give me a new one. I’m kind of getting tired of Iowa. Oh fuck! I guess I have to move on.

So again Jeremie, I’m sorry you are so upset, but I appreciate the word “please” when threatening me. You are one classy guy. And you’re right, you never did any “wrond” to me. You just did something “wrond” to the English language. And best of luck with your magazine and your WordPress blog that doesn’t allow ads. I love the free theme you picked out. It is the same one my son picked to blog about his Xbox games.

P.S: Can you reconsider though? Maybe you could go after my real-life. I have too many kids, one with special needs, I’m overwhelmed, under appreciated, have bunions, have painful varicose veins, some unknown growth on my cervix, $5.41 in savings, hair that’s falling out, pants I have to use a rubber band to fit into, a bitching menstrual cycle going on, only three beers in the frig, a ridiculous electric bill   ………………………………………………………………………………..

I finally did it RED! Here’s my 1 crazy to your 1,000,000,000 crazy.

Based on a true story. Or is it?


Okay…..I’ve done it again.

I had a black sheep blog that I put my poetry on. I decided to stop making it my bitch and put the poems on this blog. It was just too hard to keep up with and we all know…..lately….I can’t even keep up with this one.

BUT…..Like I said. I’ve done it again. I created a another blog that I didn’t tell anyone about…..WELL…..I told 2 people, so there you go…..I’m a liar and a double dipper. The problem with not telling anyone about it, (except the chosen 2)….was….hardly anyone read it. That’s my fault though. I could barely comment as me, let alone another blogger. I stopped posting there because I was debating about what to do.

SO…..I’m coming out of the closet and giving you the link to my blog, which I will not make a black sheep. This blog was created to tell a story about my life, my childhood, my family, the characters I’ve run into and blah, blah, blah……………..As the title states: Based on a true story. Only those who can find themselves in the stories will know which parts are 100% true and which are embellished for embellishment sake. AND…..Only the smart ones will refrain from commenting and showing any outrage since that would only prove which parts are true. That would be foolish!

If I’m not posting here, then hopefully, I’m posting at: Swept From Under The Rug. Now that the cat is out of the bag, I can get to posting more.

Weekly Photo Challenge: Today


SO…….The challenge was: To post a picture taken the day you read the posting about the theme of the challenge. No cheating allowed!

Lucky me…….I read this post at 9:46 at night. It’s dark outside and everyone is asleep. I didn’t think the nachos I pulled out of the oven would make a great shot, so I snapped one of the jars on my kitchen countertop.

Try to hold your excitement. AND……I don’t want to hear from those who wanted to see the nachos.

If I had a penny for everyone who didn’t read my blog, I’d have a lot of pennies.


SO……Here’s the skinny, news and meaningless update from me. God only knows, I can’t wait for someone to ask.

For those of you who actually look at my blog, you know that Word Press became my pimp at the end of April. I allowed them to place ads all over my junk. I have to say….I don’t think they knew what-the-hell to brand me with.  After about two weeks of ads, I almost made a dollar. AND…….. I’m supposed to get an update on my earnings at the end of each month. BUT…….. I haven’t heard a word from Word Press on May’s earnings. I can only imagine, it’s because they don’t know how to count  that high.

AD Page

Seriously! Who could resist the impulse to follow that simple direction?

I can hear the money now. WELL……Actually, it’s just a deafening silence. BUT……..I’m pretty sure people are passing the money around quietly to avoid attention.

AND…….Since greed has no limits…..…I decided to publish my blog on Kindle. WHY? The answer is simple. Just because I could. AND…….As a person with a degree in Advertising, I will use none of it….…hardly. Instead, I will be flying by the seat of my pants and living on a prayer. BECAUSE……….. I only enjoy the creative side, not the business/selling side. Would I do better if I pimped myself out? Probably! BUT…….Being a pimp is a full-time job, and I so enjoy being a writing whore. I don’t want to stop turning tricks just to beat my own ass when I don’t make enough dough. SO……..If Word Press is my little pimp, then I guess Kindle will be my street corner. BUT…..You’ll have to wait 48-72 hours to get a piece of me. I think Kindle needs to make sure I’m still welcome at the Free Clinic.

Hopefully, someone will stop by and be attracted to my ripped stockings and flats. Heels are a bitch!