How many times have we heard “It’s not you. It’s me.” in movies or real life? AND………Then it wraps up with the line about being friends. BUT………..What if being friendly is the problem?

How about we switch it around. It is the other person and fuck forget being friends. I’m not talking about romantic relationships here. I’m referring to other types of relationships. Romantic breakups are the most common, but friends, neighbors, co-workers and even family members breakup with one another. Just because you’re family, go to the same church, work together, live on the same street or have people in common, that doesn’t mean it’s meant to be for the two of you.  AND………..Those breakups can be messier and more emotional than the romantic ones. I think most people are just too sensitive to not being liked by all. BUT……..We, as a society have been fed a lot of crap along the way.

Why is it so difficult to break away from these relationships? It’s because we’ve heard cookie cutter one liners all our lives, encouraging us to muddle through, even if we can’t stand one another. Such as:

• Blood is thicker than water.
• Family is forever.
• Be neighborly.
• It’s important to work together.
• Kiss and make-up.
• Let’s all be friends.
• Say you’re sorry and go back to being friends.
• Can’t we all just get along? (for the new generations)

AND……What makes it worse, are the dumbasses that believe and utilize the following:

• Express yourself.
• Tell them how you feel.
• Don’t hold back.
• You got something to say. Say it to my face. (maturity at it’s best)
• You’ll feel better when you vent.
• Honesty is the best policy.

I think it’s all total crap. We feel trapped into having relationships we don’t want. Then, we feel guilty if we don’t continue them. AND………When things go astray for whatever reason, the opening up stuff begins. Bullshit! If you have a relationship worth salvaging, then go for it with manners and intellect, but most people take the opening up advice wrong. They say things only a drunken mental patient should say. AND NOW………….Texting, Facebook and other media outlets, have provided ways for people to be complete idiots. I’m not a licensed therapist. Hell, I’m not even an unlicensed one, but I’ll put in my two cents worth anyway.

• Vent to yourself until you’ve gotten all the rude bullshit out. Then, no one will be the wiser and you can carryon with life. Remember: You can’t take it back!
• Don’t bother others with stuff they don’t need to hear. Only a Jerry Springer guest would put up with cursing or cut downs and still want to have some type of relationship.
• Once you’ve made an ass out of yourself, you could extend an olive branch. If no one reaches for it, then have some dignity and walk away. Afterall, you know what you did. Let’s not add stalking to the list.

The best quote I’ve ever heard is from 1942. It allows for good manners, but doesn’t deny true feelings.

“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothin’ at all. ”

― Thumper

Personally, I think the people you surround yourself with, says a lot. It’s an indication of who you are and how you want to live. If there are people in your life that:

• hold you back
• cause drama
• are negative
• drain you emotionally (suffocate you)
• bring nothing to the table (add no value)
• go against your values
• interfere with your personal/work life
• BIG RED FLAG: Cause you to cry, feel anxiety or get nausea when you encounter them…….

……..then “Thumper” them and hop away.

Tags: breaking up, brutal honesty, friendships, IT HAD TO BE SAID!, lessons, life crap, Relationships, you know this is what you were thinking